The essence of Good Life: Inner vs. Outer Scorecard

I'm reading this book now, after finishing, 'The art of thinking clearly.'

“Which would you rather? To be the most intelligent person on earth but considered the stupidest? Or the stupidest person on earth considered the most intelligent?”

Those two lines from Rolf Dobelli‘s ‘The art of the good life‘ kept me in a complete conundrum for a while. I closed the book and thought about my inner notion, ‘What would I rather be?’

It’s tempting to fool myself by saying, ‘Well, I don’t really care what other people think about me! I want to be the most intelligent person, albeit being perceived dumb by others.’

Reading books has been my only task these days

But then I thought, ‘Wait a minute. Deep inside, I do really care about getting recognized. What’s the point to be successful in life when none cares about my success?’

The question perplexed me like a paradox. At some point, I thought, ‘What about being the most intelligent person on earth and considered by others the same?’

That’s definitely possible, but I think questioning this way was not the motive of Dobelli. He rather questioned the built-in belief of humans who go after excellence for the sake of peer appreciation. As he described in the book, heeding towards outward information and defining success based on others’ opinions have to do a lot with the upbringing of a person. While teaching your kids, you need to emphasize their personal behavior rather than the ‘What’s the world is going to think about you‘ approach.

Now I can relate to every single line of that chapter of the book.

Indeed, I have been born and brought up in the ‘Prison of a good reputation.’ I was taught to care about externalities more than my true sense of inner feelings.

Parents play a vital role in shaping children’s perceptions of life

As a good student, I was assumed to be a doctor or engineer by my peers. I heard it like thousand times in my life, ‘What others will think if you don’t do this?’

‘What my neighbors will think if you don’t do a job?’

‘What your uncle will think if you don’t pursue higher studies?’

It seems like I (or we?) have been living in a world where satisfying others is the only sacred duty for us. We are born and will die to conform to social norms and rules. We are taught to do so and hopefully, will continue to conform for centuries.

As our society will collapse otherwise, as we depend on collectivism.

Collectivism has always been the fueling impetus of the ancient society

Or maybe it won’t.

Many civilized societies nowadays have learned to ‘mind their own businesses.’ They teach their children, ‘Value your core perceptions first. This way you will eventually pay off your society too.’

I won’t go for any debate. But at this point, I think breaking the prison of a good reputation is so important for a good life. The world will go on its own way of evolving around you. Only you have the remote to decide how you will respond.

There comes the concept of the inner and outer scorecards. How much weight would you put on other people’s opinions vs. your true inner satisfaction? Would you write a blog because people appreciate you, or you’d do so to satisfy your crude feelings? Have you chosen your profession because your mom said so? Or you’d rather do your job unpaid?

You have to find your answers for yourself

Unfortunately, no exact answer can be given to everybody.